Felicia, 16
My big day, 26th April.
Life has been tough for me.
I learn from every mistakes I've made.

Hello, am using Mummy's desktop to surf the net now as Bro's using my laptop to do his things. Anyway, I woke up at six today although I can go school a lil later. Supposingly to meet that pighead of mine but however he couldn't get to wake up. But i'm almost done preparing already k! Gosh, nevermind. I went to have a 'lil rest then on my bed. Until Hanwen texted me and asked if I want to have breakfast at Macdonald's, got my hair bundled and I went to take the bus down to Yishun. Waited for Houjie to meet us at Macdonald's and it's already going to be nine soon. We took the bus to school and went back to class for lessons. Had a few exams results back, pretty upset. But I guarantee I'll work harder the next time round during the final term. :) Hope Daddy would accept this time round's results. If not I could be cooked in the curry lol! After school baby came to fetch me from school and cabbed back to his place. (; Actually I was intending to go home but didn't want to abandon him haha. So I surprise him by saying I'll accompany him back home! And his reaction was: 'Why you not going home never tell me ah! Make me waste my time styling my hair. If I know earlier that you're not going home then I can don't style my hair lor, then ask you take cab come can already.' Lol! His reaction was so cute! Because he always spend aaaaaa lot of time styling his 'precious' hair. And he's so troublesome one k! I was super tired when I got up his place, and I slept till around 5pm and went back home. 8)

All right, here's the results that I got back so far:
Physics : 10/50
Principle Of Accounts: 11/100

I admit I'm a disappointment, I bet Daddy would say so too. But I didn't really have enough help during the exam period, it's not that I do not want to help myself to improve, but seriously I don't have enough help. Friends prefer to study on their own, or having some self-study at home, or they've their own things to do. There ain't really someone who's really available for me to let me seek for help. I'm really helpless at that point of time too, but what could I do? I still have to face the reality. I swear I gave my very best and put in my utmost effort. I even went to the extend to burn midnight oil just to study for certain subjects and hence contracting with fever and flu. But this is still what I got in the end. Why? Daddy ain't gonna listen to me explaining all this, he ain't going to.'

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A dedication for you, Nana Sist. :
I once disliked you, because in the past we still wasn't very close then. And because of i-forgot-what reason, we turned out to be closer and closer, and closer as before. We had countless laughters, and we always have a lot of cocky stuffs to gossip about. Though I admit that we still have some arguments at times too. You really guided me and helped me through a lot of things. I was caught by the HSA and you helped me to hide it from my Bigbro as you know how his character was, though he still came to know about it eventually. You bought me things, and things that I said that I would like to have, you would never fail to get it for me when you've got the money. When I have quarrels with Zilong you would always cheer me up, when I'm in my room crying you would always try to know what happen. When you have some problems/quarrels with my bigbro you would sometimes turn to me to have a hearty chat. We were so close that we shared our things around, even bras. (Actually I wore yours accidentally.) I felt uncomfortable when you're not around, staying over at my place, I felt something missing. I seldom have laughters at home, don't really have someone whom can allow me to chat to or talk alot with, or someone that can cheer me up. You know I don't confide into my brothers, or parents. Though I may say you're an outsider, but I treated you as one of the family. And that's the reason, you're an outside and that's why I can manage to confide into you so much. Because I'm not used to confide with people whom I'm related with, as in blood related.
It was already shocking/lonely enough that you're not staying over my place out of sudden, but it's even shocking that you're not coming back anymore. I couldn't accept this truth at first, because I really din't believe this would happen, and I was really really shocked. Coming to know about the separation of you and brother, I came to realise the reason why he always comes home late, it's very late and it's like almost everyday. He just couldn't cope with the loneliness without you. I can see this, I can feel it too, because I've been in a relationship too, and I'm already a grown-up. Yes I admit that there's certain things I may not know, because I'm still young, but I have common senses too. I can feel that brother ain't coping well without you, sister. He look that he's coping well because he just don't show it out. He is not. He is just trying to numb his feelings by spending time on certain hobbies, and trying not to have free time for himself to think about you. Sometimes it's really sad seeing him like this, at home. But you know, he won't confide in anyone because he wants to show that he's strong. And it really makes me feel sad. The more he's trying to pretend to be happy, the more I gets upset. I really want to cheer him up, but I don't know how to. Coming to talking to siblings/parents, I really don't know how to put words. Sometimes when he gets home early, I can see that he really feels bored at home. Sometimes he would even come into my room and talk to us. When you're around, he wouldn't do so right? Because he has you in the past. And he really feels lonely now. He has a blog now too, do you know about that? That shows how he needed someone to know how he feels.. You know I don't want or wish the both of you to be separated. I hope you would really consider it again, I know the both of you need each other.

Hope you'll see this, and really think about it again ..
I miss you, I miss the times that we've been crazying together.

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All right, gotta get my mood right and wait for that pig of mine to wake up soon. :)